Dead End Follies

The McClure household had a strange feeling to it when they were not there. Its silence was hard to beat. Every sound we made, might have been loud talk, slamming bathroom door or even just tinting dishes were muffled by the thick stillness of the scenery. I don't know if Jay McClure was a looter or just an old furniture afficionado, but his house was an unbreathable, crammed stocking room of antiques. Marcus, Maria or myself didn't realize this before he left with the strange people of the St. Cuthbert Guard. No one really liked the feeling of squatting the house of a family that was militarily removed from there. Plus, we figured out we had to move since we were ill-equipped for any kind of hit squad or whatever they were going to send us. We didn't have weapons that caused any type of massive damage, so any kind of number decrepancy would have disadvantaged us big time. We had to keep moving.

For the first time though, we had the opportunity to sit down with Maria Magdelena, the religiously named schizo. Both Marcus and I were longing for this moment where we could figure it out with her. Get revenge on her personal Jesus and get that map we were after. Marcus pulled down a chair for her and served him a glass of filtered tea (apparently we were not the only ones that figured out how to filter water. McClure's contraption was way more sophisicated than ours though, therefore it gave a better quality of water. He had the completely pure stuff). Maria sat without saying a word, still a bit shaken up by the altered state she was in before. She had lost the angelic grace though. I hoped we could have a rather nomal conversation with her.

''So...''Marcus said. ''About that Jesus guy...''

He took the time to pronounce Jesus with a latino accent.

''What about him?'' said Maria, looking down at her cup of tea.

''Tell me about both of you, how have you guys met?''

''We're both from Spanish Harlem. We went to high school together. You know, when you live where everything and everyone is always dragging you in the wrong direction, do something right and you'll shine. Jesus was the only guy I ever met that wanted to do something with his life, so for the girl of Spanish Harlem, he was a dream you know? Some kind of way out from this dead end shithole.''

''And Jesus chose you?'' I asked.

''He did, in grade twelve, ten months before prom. I was so happy. He had just learned he had a scholarship to study cartography at Columbia, we were out of Harlem forever.''

I paused her: ''Woah woah woah...you're talking of Jesus as he was a new job or if you had won at the lottery. Did you love him at all?''

She smiled as someone that Marcus and I didn't see and looked up at me:

''Of course I did. He was my white knight in shining armor. He was my stupid, cheesy, teenage fantasy. Even poor girls can have them. Don't you think? Not every latina wants to have four kids at twenty and push drugs under the table to feed them while their husband is in jail. Movies make us to me like that, but we ain't''.

Maria had this surreal tone when she was talking about Jesus. Like she was living her good moments with him all over again. Her intensity was radiating through the room when she spoke about that guy. I had stop doubting she could hurt anyone.

Even pre-quarantine, her place was probably in an hospital, or at least medicated by a doctor.

''Then what happened?'' asked Marcus.

''We moved in to lower Manhattan, into a tiny two and a half''.

''How was it over there?''

''All right I guess. I found a job in a bakery, no one wanted to do these shitty shifts, so that was easy. I quickly started to make more money than both of my parents ever made in their lifetime.''

''With Jesus I mean''

Dark clouds covered her face.

''Oh that guy...''

Marcus and me looked at each other. This was going to be juicy. We both made an enormous effort not to smile in eager anticipation of what was coming. We were both starting to be very fond of Maria. She had a brutal honesty in her despair that made you want to hug her and tell her everything was going to be OK. She had a candid, childish way about her manners that made you want to care.

''That maricon found himself a kinship with Enrique Iglesias or something. He started to live the campus lifestyle pretty hard. I would wait for him to come home after my shift and he never would because he partied with his friends using the money I earned and placed in our account. So within two months I found myself alone with no money to do anything. But it was all right you know? Because one smile of Jesus and I forgave him everything....''

Maria tucked her knees under her chin and her eyes filled up with tears. Marcus and I were both silent and focused, like we were in the middle of a captivating movie.

''...I forgave him everything like his dumb chica he was dating on the Campus.''

''That two timing fuck!'' I said.

''But you know what man? I forgave that too. I loved my man and as long as I was number one in his book, I closed my eyes on the ones that were behind.''

''How has he managed to get you into Durango of all places?''

''Jesus brough another chica at home. I was going to work and this asshole was coming home drunk with another chick. I mean, I was trying to be a good fiancée and all, but he was pushing the button, wasn't he?''

''Yeah, well yeah.'' I babbled.

''He accused me of never being there for him. I made money that he drank and partied with, I stayed home all evenings waiting for him and he told me I wasn't there to support him during stressful time or whatever. That I didn't know how to had fun''
''So what did you do?''

She had a sincere laught and said: ''I sliced his puta open''.

We stayed silent for a few seconds, then I felt I was forced to add: ''And you let that asshole get away with it?''

''No, no, I carved him up a little bit too'' she said, like a girl telling her parents she made her homework. ''But pendejo escaped and called the police after I ran him down the hallway with a butcher knife, screaming. Believe me guys, with the smile I gave him, he's not likely to seduce other chicas anytime soon.''

''And when was this?''

''Six weeks ago!''

''Oh fuck, so Jesus, taking for granted he's still alive, would still be in Columbia no?''

''Hun hun'' she said, shaking her head. ''He's doing an internship on Staten Island. He's still alive over there.''

''How d'you know?'' Marcus asked.

''I just do'' she said.

Nobody argued with that. There were things you just knew and most of the times these things were right.

''Let's go to Staten Island then'' I said. ''St. Cuthbert's Guard is not likely to look up for us over there.''

We all got up at the same time. I think we all wanted to leave this place very badly. The McClure's household intimacy was heavy and judgmental. It wanted us out of there. Even gone, Jay McClure's quiet charisma was still looking down on us with all his arrogance. I felt bad to leave this house to St. Cuthbert's Guard, but it wasn't my house. Someone else had failed to defend it and in these troubled times, I had enough problems trying to stay alive, let alone taking care of my brother andnow Maria.

Her story reached out to me. I had no doubt she was clinically insane, or at least problematic, but some people tend to run into crappy situations that leave them no choice but to show the worse in them. There was a part of her that wanted nothing but to stay out of trouble and live on a day to day basis. No one becomes a baker if they don't really want it. She spoke of her profession with a string of pride in her voice. Ron the baker, I knew in my childhood always bitched and moaned about how shitty his job was so I know that for Maria to talk like this about the job, I knew she meant well. She wasn't the type of girl to lie either. She didn't had anything to gain. She was convinced she chould've got to Staten Island with threats and violence, so she was both of us as just tagging along.

When Marcus and I hopped in the car with Maria in the back, we didn't need to talk to settle out course of action. We were going to ruin that guy's day, get the maps of the clear water streams and get the hell out of there. For the first time in a while, I saw a clear way out of this. Simplicity felt good sometimes.