Manly or Macho Man?

A few of you might have noticed I killed Dead End Gaming last week. Considering my involvement with Hooked Gamers and The Gamers Studio, it became a massive waste of time. I still like video games though and I thought that this article by Yahtzee is a good way of re-introducing them subtly into Dead End Follies. Here in this guess post, he traces the line in-between the concepts of manliness and macho. Very accurate in his over-the-top way.


by Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw

Dead To Rights: Retribution, like so many shooters, is a game about manliness. It's about situations wherein big strong men with muscles like Greek statues spurt hot bullets from out of their massive, two-handed death cocks. That's when they're not sticking their heads in each other's armpits and grappling over which one gets to be the bitch.

I'm not prejudiced. If you get a rush from having your prostate tickled by a male friend's huge mustache then more power to you, but personally I find nothing more off-putting than an overly "macho" character. Now, I know that action game protagonists are almost invariably male because of society and marketing and all that, and that in games where a lot of things are required to be dead the heroes are going to have to be physically strong and capable in a fight, which are typically masculine traits. But the point I want to make is that there's a significant difference between being manly, an awesome masculine badass who we can respect and admire; and being macho, a muscular, insecure tosspot with no social skills. This is a distinction that more games need to realize.

Here are some examples of manly characters: Niko Bellic (GTAIV). Ezio Auditore da Firenze (Assassin's Creed 2). The Prince of Persia (Sands of Time / Two Thrones).

Here are some examples of macho characters: Jack Slate (Dead To Rights). Marcus Fenix (Gears of War). The Prince of Persia (Warrior Within).

The manly man equips himself appropriately. He wears clothing that combines protection with storage space while still allowing for flexible movement. He arms himself with effective, concealable weapons. In pre-industrial games, this will mean whippy, undecorated and razor-sharp swords. In gun-based games, he will depend on a simple handgun for small-scale firefights, switching when appropriate to the popular shotguns and rifles of the era.

The macho man will either wear the most overly complicated suit of armor he can find, emblazoned with skulls and spiky bits, or will run around in his pants in the belief that this will prove something about himself. His ideal length for a sword is roughly his own height, and for most situations requiring guns he will solely use devices that have been proved capable of completely disintegrating a heavy goods vehicle.

The manly man has a full emotional range. While fully capable of feeling and acting upon his anger and resentment when confronting his enemies, he is civil and even-tempered around neutral parties and warm and affectionate to his close associates. In his lowest moments of despair he's not afraid to let his emotions show as he seeks solace in his allies and perhaps sheds some dignified tears, but he is equally unafraid to confront the sources of his displeasure and take appropriate retaliation.

The macho man thinks emotions are for women and poofters. The only emotion he is prepared to display is screaming fury, especially as he leaps down from a first-story window, impossibly huge sword pointed directly at the eye socket of an upward-staring foe. When dealing with allies and neutral parties whose murder will be frowned upon, the macho character will at best be merely rude and indifferent, and at worst will grab them by the lapels, shove them into walls and bark gravel-voiced threats. In place of shedding tears, the macho character will only make a curious tight-lipped, boggle-eyed expression of distaste before stomping off alone to jam his giant sword into somebody's jollies.

The manly man respects his fellow human beings. While physically capable, the manly man understands that one's worth can't be measured in combat skill alone. He has the greatest respect for scholars and technical experts who have mastered necessary skills that he himself lacks. He is patient with children, and respectful of the opposite sex. The manly man romances women he finds particularly intriguing, and given the appropriate mutual consents, will do her tenderly and satisfyingly right up the Edith Piaf. And she will love it.

The macho man feels that anyone who can't knife-fight their way out of a giant kraken's embrace probably deserves to die, and when technical skills are required, will put the nearest appropriate boffin in an armlock like an overgrown school bully and force him or her to do the work. The macho character thinks girls are icky and avoids them where possible out of fear of cooties, or out of fear that her grotesque Emmeline Pankhursts will somehow suck in and consume his masculinity. The nearest thing the macho man gets to physical intimacy is having communal showers with his equally oversized buddies in between armed conflicts. While no sexual horseplay will occur at the time, he will probably be thinking about it later when he jerks off. Really angrily.

Anyway.